List 12 of your original characters:
1.) Mayann Sparks
2.) Falco Peregrini
3.) Andy Kurikka
4.) Lou Robinson
5.) Goldie Schapiro
6.) Mochi
7.) Ivan Volkov
8.) Pontus de la Gardie
9.) Jean Tsoubaki
10.) Gwendolyn Moore
11.) Father Pietro
12.) Ettore Luccini

01) Who would make a better college professor, 6 or 11?
Mochi or Father Pietro?... Well, Mochi's goals in life are not that different from an average college prof's - regular meals, long naps, marking her territory, analyzing stuff to shreds... While Father Pietro is mostly interested in his roses. It's a close competition, which Mochi wins by being a FUZZY PUPPY

02) Do you think 2 is hot? How hot?
He's hotter than the Seventh Terrace of Purgatory. He's hotter than the Second Circle of Hell. And he'll get you straight to the First Sphere of Heaven. (Dante)

03) 12 sends 8 on a mission. What is it, and does it succeed?
Only potential scenario: Pontus joins the pinkshirts for the pretty Italian boys, "handsome and noble of race like a virginal hero of Ajax' time" (d'Annunzio). Ettore is the admired captain, but unfortunately the missions are not very aesthetic, involving bullying labour activists and political protesters. You have to draw the line somewhere, figures Pontus, fed up with the footsoldiers of proto-fascism.

04) What is or would be 9's favorite book?
Jean Tsoubaki's favourite is a collection of Hokusai's manga, or a portfolio of his ippitsu paintings (with one stroke of the brush).

05) Would it make more sense for 2 to swear fealty to 6, or the other way around?
It would make much more sense for Falco to be Mochi's slave. Yes. Because Mochi is FUZZIER

06) For some reason, 5 is looking for a roommate. Should s/he share a studio apartment with 9 or with 10?
I think Goldie would get along well with Jean. He reminds her of her talented nephews whom she loves very much. She would make him chicken soup and mother him and promote his genius. (I think her anger towards Falco comes from a suppressed desire to mother him, too. But she is too proud to show that to a man when she believes that he loathes her.) She would probably get along with Mrs Moore, too; though Mrs Moore is too much of a WASP snob to share a flat with a radical feminist gynaecologist of an Eastern European persuasion.

07) 2, 7 and 12 have dinner together. Where do they go, and what do they discuss?
Falco and Ivan (the pointy-eared Russian Anarchist) would first have a dramatic face-off with lots of black trench-coats and cassocks fluttering in the wind. Then Ettore would prance in and suggest a nice Napolitano restaurant that makes the pizza just like mamma. Falco is deeply humiliated by his stereotypical Southern compatriot, but Ivan is hungry like a wolf. Over huge plates of spaghetti, Falco and Ivan agree that property is theft, but disagree on whether it's worse to preach opium to the poor or throw bombs at the rich.

08) 3 challenges 10 to a duel. What happens?
Andy would win by technical K.O. Nah, he's much too meek to challenge a lady with a cigarette holder to a duel. He would probably just start a revolution, send her to re-education camp and redistribute her illgotten gains to the masses.

09) If 1 stole 8's most precious possession, how would s/he get it back?
Is it his specially-designed Poiret smoking gown? Is it a Ming vase? Is it a pair of Maurice Chevalier's undies? No, Pontus' most precious possession is his Pomeranian, Hannibal! The only way for Pontus to rescue "Honey-Ball" from the cuddly clutches of Mayann would be to design a new outfit for her - no bananas, no coconuts, no feathers - well maybe some ostrich plumes - but something classy, slinky, silky, trailing, to be worn while crooning a romantic torch song. Luckily, it's his job already.

10) Suggest a title for a story in which 7 and 12 both attain what they most desire.
Ivan and Ettore? Why that would be a very explosive and very exploitative fumetti. Or a Pasolini movie: "120 Days That Shook Sodom" (get the joke)

11) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted 4 and 1 to work together?
Mayann and Lou already work together... (Though we haven't seen it so much in the comic, since they are on vacation!) Their stage acts, rehearsals, flashbacks to their youth, chats backstage, going shopping together, playing games... cuddling MOCHI

12) If 7 visited you for the weekend, how would you get along?
Ivan and me... like a house on fire. Oh, we'd get plastered and plot the revolution. And "anyone who makes plans for after the revolution is a reactionary"!! (Bakunin)

13) If you could command 3 to perform any one task or service for you, what would it be?
I would command Andy to carry me around on his shoulders when in town, because it's my eternal fantasy to ride around on a big and broad-shouldered Finnish guy (oops that didn't come out like it should have)

14) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw 11?
I laugh in the face of my puny friends list! What kinda dweeby Livejournal meme is this anyway! (Take this as a challenge, friends)

15) If 2 had to choose sides between 4 and 5, which would it be?
Falco between Lou and Goldie - now that's a delicate situation! Heh heh... Um, well, perhaps he would choose Goldie, since she is a reasonable authority figure, even though she's a babymurdering agnostic Jewess. So if the two ladies had a quarrel, Falco would side with law and order. At least Goldie is wearing a dress.

16) What might 10 shout while charging into battle?
"Get me another gin fizz, sweetie."

17) If you chose a song to represent 8, which song would you choose?
"Jazzgossen" by Karl Gerhard. (Here's an AMV with Sanji from One Piece! And a translation of the lyrics! Genius!)

18) 1, 6, and 12 are having dim sum at a Chinese restaurant. There is only one scallion pancake left, and they all reach for it at the same time. Who gets to eat it?
Mayann, Mochi and Ettore - the perfect date... Mochi WIN

19) What might be a good pick-up line for 2 to use on 10?
Ooh, Falco hits on Mrs Moore... I always suspected he had a thing for more mature ladies. Well, as long as he sticks to his mother tongue, he could say anything, but here's an idea:
"Dammi i dolor del mondo, io ti darò degli angeli l'amore."

20) What would 5 most likely be arrested for?
For advertisement and sale of birth control devices, or chaining herself to the parliament and demanding votes for women.

21) What is 6's secret?
Mochi's secret is that she's made entirely out of MOCHI

22) If 11 and 9 were racing to a destination, who would get there first?
Jean. He is already in Heaven, but Father Pietro still has to make that extra effort.

23) If you had to walk home through a bad neighbourhood late at night, would you feel safer in the company of 7 or 8?
Well, Pontus the Swede could prove surprisingly scrappy in close combat, being of Viking and Walloon stock, but Ivan Volkov's mere pointy-eared profile would keep all bad guys at a safe distance. As well as his tendency to light his stinking mahorka fags with Bakunin cocktails (like Molotov's, but more passionate).